When many people face interpersonal relationships (especially feelings), the biggest obstacle is the sense of security. Because I don’t feel safe, I don’t want to enter a relationship. Because I don’t feel safe, I check my time, because I don’t feel safe, I choose to leave the other party…etc. I have experienced and heard about security issues, but the truth is what? Let’s go back and look at what it feels like to be safe! We disassemble these three words, we can divide it into an adjective and a noun, respectively, security and feeling (referred to as feeling), so in simple terms, security is a feeling of security, that is, I believe that I am safe. We can see from the sentence that I believe that I am safe. The sense of security is actually just how a person judges whether he is safe and whether he believes in his own safety. It has nothing to do with the actual safety. I have seen the most insecure people, probably the idioms who are worried about the horror of the sky. Even if he is doing well, he is still worried about whether the sky will fall every day. He has no basis to say that the sky will fall. But he just doesn’t believe that he is safe. The reason why people worry about becoming idioms is because this person’s behavior is stupid and funny, but when we laugh at him, we ignore it. When we are insecure, we are not different from his behavior. Many people have no sense of security, so they will have to report, report, check, check, and check the phone. This may make them believe that they are safe in this relationship, but in reality. These behaviors have nothing to do with whether they are safe or not. Those who will lame will still think of ways to lame. These methods of seeking security will only allow the lame people to evolve more exquisite kicking techniques. So, whether you believe in yourself or not, it will not affect your safety. Even if you believe that your building is strong and the earthquake is coming, it will be crushed and you will be crushed. How do you believe that there is no relationship at all; and even if you feel that you live in a ruin, any wind and rain may endanger your life, but you are not dead or die. Security is simply a non-existent thing, but we are crazy looking for products in this imaginary world, and even trying to ask for it. Ask, what do you not give, what do you want to give? We have more or less worries about security, but worry can’t change anything. It only makes us waste time on things that are completely ineffective, and we are distressed. You can try to list an insecure feeling The list can contain: the other half of the lame, the other half and other heterosexual messages, the other half of the dating site, the other half do not love me, my friends do not like me, my girlfriend is pregnant, but the child is not me / Pregnancy, but my boyfriend said that the child is not his, friends are saying bad things behind me… You can do everything you can to make you feel insecure, and then help them to take the place and see Who will make you feel least secure. In the end, you will find that no matter how you arrange it, it will not affect whether they will happen. Someone asked me a long time ago: Why don’t you watch your girlfriend’s mobile phone? I said: What will be embarrassing is to see what is the use? Will she not delete the record? Then the other party asked: Then why can you let your girlfriend watch your mobile phone? I said: Because they will be more assured, they will not come to me again. Concerns about security have nothing to do with our lives. We don’t feel safe, it usually means that I worry about the future, and when you are worried about the future, yours is now passing by. The future is actually just the next moment in the future. When you are worried about the future, you are losing the present. So whether you care or not, what you are afraid of may or may not happen, it does not matter whether you worry or not. In the law of attraction, your fear of safety will not only protect you from danger, but even more likely to be dangerous. For security, there is another, more appropriate definition: Believe that you have the ability to deal with any situation. When you have this true sense of security, that is, I believe that I have the ability to keep myself safe. In time, you don’t have to rely on anything outside to make you feel safe, and naturally you don’t have to look for the illusion of security. If you are really upset about the future, please do something that will help you in the future. Suppose you are worried about the other half of your lame, then please take a look at what is wrong with you? Why do you have such anxiety? Where do these worries come from? Is it because you think too much, or because of the other party’s behavior? If there are some hidden worries in your relationship, then what you should do is not to check the other’s mobile phone, but to deal with your problems; if your relationship seems to be no problem, but you are very insecure, then What you should do is not to check the other party’s mobile phone, but to deal with your own problems; if your relationship and your personal problems are no problem, the problem is the other party, then you should leave him alone, have been to yours. Life! Anyway, it will still be awkward, will break up or will be divided. In the end, you will find that checking the other party’s mobile phone is the most useless thing in the whole world. When you want to seek security in any external person, you will find that everything is in vain, because how to be safe is your own decision, you will always have the right and ability to correct the definition of security, you simply You shouldn’t tie your feelings to others, it’s not only stupid, but it will keep you subject to life. Let yourself be able to face and deal with in any situation is the ability you really should pursue. Your safety can be completely given to yourself.